Tuesday, June 11, 2013


It's funny how life can be. Such a strange mix of ups and downs, like the rise and fall of the ocean waves.

I'm on another anti-depressant. I take 150mg of Wellbutrin in the mornings, and the 20mg of Celexa in the evenings. I think it's starting to help some.

I'm burned out in my job. I love my career field, but it's so tiring and draining having so many cases, with such a high turnover rate, and wondering if I'm really making a difference. I'm ready for a job that pays better, and is more fitting for my current license level. If I could just take the time to apply to jobs.

I'm in another financial crisis, because I got a late fee for paying the rent late. I had the money in the bank, but I pay rent online, and stupid me fell asleep and forgot to pay by the deadline that day. It was the last day of the grace period, too. So I'll probably be overdrafting again soon. I'm sick of this. It makes me wonder why I spent 8 years in college, to have the same financial problems as if I hadn't gone at all. I'm trying to sell my Nikon to get some extra cash, but so far no luck.

Things didn't pan out with the guy I went on a date with in the previous entry. He said he didn't feel a connection, and we haven't talked since. At first I was sad, but I've talked to a few other guys since then, and actually went on a date with a guy this past Sunday that I really seem to have connected with. We went on a walk on the beach, ate at a local restaurant, got Starbucks, then saw a movie. It was essentially an all-day date. At the end of it all, we kissed, and it was wonderful (he has since said it was the best kiss he's had in years). We continue to talk, and he's made it very clear that he's interested in taking our relationship further. We can't go out this weekend, because my family is coming to visit and he's going on a camping trip, but we're making plans to meet up next weekend. We met on match.com, and he lives about 2 hours away. I'm a little apprehensive about the distance, as my experience with distance dating with Natalie was generally a disaster. On the other hand, that was distance from North Carolina to Chicago, whereas at least this is manageable to be able to see each other on weekends. I'm trying to take things slow and just take things as they come, to avoid getting my hopes up and then having him disappear like what happened in January, but so far I think things are looking up in the dating end, finally. Here's hoping the second half of 2013 isn't quite as crazy as the first half has been.

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